What is the singlemost important thing in life? Each one of us has a different answer for this. Yet the averages come to this list: money, health, principles, happiness, quality of life, status, power, knowledge, (in no particular order), etc. For one who has none of these, it is a vicious cycle.
The term 'vicious cycle' was first introduced to me in school where we learnt about Indian farmers and their debt situation. It was said that the farmers who are already poor have to wait to sell their crops to get money for daily needs and end up taking loans at high interest rates/mortgaging their land, they are not able to repay it due to low produce/price and end up taking up more loan, even when they die, their children inherit the loan, thus forcing them to toil early on in life to pay off the debts and fall in the same vicious circle that is continuing for generations. I understood the concept perfectly. Back then everything was black and white. The circle was complete.
At an age that I hardly understood the meaning of love and sacrifice I wondered why my maid kept asking us for an advance to pay her daughter's tuition fee! I was appalled. I realized she made Rs. 200 a month per house and she probably cleaned 4 houses. Out of her Rs. 1000, she wanted to spend Rs. 100 on TUITIONS? How preposterous. Knowing girl child education was free I felt she was making a very extravagant attempt at educating a child who does not have access to any educated person or books or even the English language. That is where lay the answer.
She was making a huge deal to educate her girl child and that too without any shortcomings. So what if after 10 ten years she was married away to an engineer who worked in a manufacturing setup! Returning from the wedding I thought to myself, what a waste of education! But my maid did not. My illiterate, tribal, below the poverty line maid who did not have access to Nehru's writings. She knew, she somehow knew she was right. I now know why!
She broke the cycle. Not her daughter. She made a sacrifice. While it would have been easy to have her child accompany her and earn a little more, she let her child stay in school. Irrespective of the girl's absolute disgust towards studies, she forced her to learn from other sources. She broke the cycle by doing exactly what the government wanted her to do: give schooling to her child for free.
While we say free, we cannot negate the opportunity cost that it burdens some parents with. For many of them, the girl child becomes a helping hand, a baby sitter, a cook, a company for the old…anything but a child. One and sometimes a couple of generations have to give up the most important thing in life because they are fighting for a long term cause. A fight they do not even know they can win. A small distraction, an unwanted relationship, an accident, anything can mar the beautiful freedom they fight for. What is in it for them?
Educated till the 3rd grade, the girl child (now a married housewife) knows counting and calculation. She keeps tabs on incomes and expenses of the household and budgets her husband's hard earned money.
The girl, educated till the 5th grade knows the importance of washing hands with soap before a meal. She protects her family's health.
Educated till the 7th grade, she understands the meaning of right and wrong, morals and principles and passes them on to her children early on in life.
Educated till the 8th grade, she knows the meaning of contraceptives and ensures a happy married life with one or two children.
Educated till SSC, she works part time as a peon in a nearby school while her children study. She now can buy good quality goods for her family with the added exposure and financial freedom.
Educated beyond that, she could become anything…she could start a business, she could volunteer as a social worker, she could teach, she could work, she could just mind the house full-time. But she will still be the source of power that her entire family revolves around.
She will be different from her predecessors. Her knowledge will not be based on religious texts or folk lore alone. Her methods will not be dictated by traditions and blind faith. She will not kill her child by not reading the expiry date on the medicine. She will not take her husband's bashing when he comes home drunk. She will not put her health as the last priority no matter what everyone says. She will not blindly follow her father, husband and son. She will not re-enter the cycle.
The term 'vicious cycle' was first introduced to me in school where we learnt about Indian farmers and their debt situation. It was said that the farmers who are already poor have to wait to sell their crops to get money for daily needs and end up taking loans at high interest rates/mortgaging their land, they are not able to repay it due to low produce/price and end up taking up more loan, even when they die, their children inherit the loan, thus forcing them to toil early on in life to pay off the debts and fall in the same vicious circle that is continuing for generations. I understood the concept perfectly. Back then everything was black and white. The circle was complete.
At an age that I hardly understood the meaning of love and sacrifice I wondered why my maid kept asking us for an advance to pay her daughter's tuition fee! I was appalled. I realized she made Rs. 200 a month per house and she probably cleaned 4 houses. Out of her Rs. 1000, she wanted to spend Rs. 100 on TUITIONS? How preposterous. Knowing girl child education was free I felt she was making a very extravagant attempt at educating a child who does not have access to any educated person or books or even the English language. That is where lay the answer.
She was making a huge deal to educate her girl child and that too without any shortcomings. So what if after 10 ten years she was married away to an engineer who worked in a manufacturing setup! Returning from the wedding I thought to myself, what a waste of education! But my maid did not. My illiterate, tribal, below the poverty line maid who did not have access to Nehru's writings. She knew, she somehow knew she was right. I now know why!
She broke the cycle. Not her daughter. She made a sacrifice. While it would have been easy to have her child accompany her and earn a little more, she let her child stay in school. Irrespective of the girl's absolute disgust towards studies, she forced her to learn from other sources. She broke the cycle by doing exactly what the government wanted her to do: give schooling to her child for free.
While we say free, we cannot negate the opportunity cost that it burdens some parents with. For many of them, the girl child becomes a helping hand, a baby sitter, a cook, a company for the old…anything but a child. One and sometimes a couple of generations have to give up the most important thing in life because they are fighting for a long term cause. A fight they do not even know they can win. A small distraction, an unwanted relationship, an accident, anything can mar the beautiful freedom they fight for. What is in it for them?
Educated till the 3rd grade, the girl child (now a married housewife) knows counting and calculation. She keeps tabs on incomes and expenses of the household and budgets her husband's hard earned money.
The girl, educated till the 5th grade knows the importance of washing hands with soap before a meal. She protects her family's health.
Educated till the 7th grade, she understands the meaning of right and wrong, morals and principles and passes them on to her children early on in life.
Educated till the 8th grade, she knows the meaning of contraceptives and ensures a happy married life with one or two children.
Educated till SSC, she works part time as a peon in a nearby school while her children study. She now can buy good quality goods for her family with the added exposure and financial freedom.
Educated beyond that, she could become anything…she could start a business, she could volunteer as a social worker, she could teach, she could work, she could just mind the house full-time. But she will still be the source of power that her entire family revolves around.
She will be different from her predecessors. Her knowledge will not be based on religious texts or folk lore alone. Her methods will not be dictated by traditions and blind faith. She will not kill her child by not reading the expiry date on the medicine. She will not take her husband's bashing when he comes home drunk. She will not put her health as the last priority no matter what everyone says. She will not blindly follow her father, husband and son. She will not re-enter the cycle.
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